Thursday, September 25, 2008

10 Years



I can't believe that it has been ten years that Dustin has been gone. I miss him so much! I think now more than ever I am really saddened by the fact that there are so many things that he is missing, so many people that he will never know. I look at all the things that have happened in the last ten years, the joys and the pain, and wish that he was still here! He never got the chance to meet my husband, or Brandon's wife. He will never get to play with our babies. He will never experience the joys of being a husband, father or uncle. I regret that he won't know the joy of watching little D grow up, go through his crazy teenage years and turn into a man. I regret that he never got to watch Josh drum his heart out. I regret that he will never know that bond with his brothers that changes as they age. I wish that he were here so that he could go on surfing trips to Costa Rica with Brandon and lil D, I wish that he and lil D could spend time together teaching Dominic to snowboard. I wish he were here! I miss him so very much and my heart aches with sadness!

I know that I will see my brothers again. I know that Dustin and Josh are hanging out together (probably getting in trouble) and missing us too. I love them both so much!

7 comments:

Unknown said...

I can't believe it has been ten years. I still remember his smiling face and his fun attitude. He was a great kid. I know he is with Josh and that they are getting into trouble. No doubt!:D Take care A! I am thinking of you.

Megan said...

I just want you to know that I love you. I know how hard this day is for you and I can't even imagine how much you must miss him. I do know though that he is still very much a part of your life. I know he is watching you and is proud of ALL of you. I also know that he does know your babies. I am sure that him and Josh are lovin' on those new little ones before they come to you and Brandon. I want you to know how much I admire you. I love your family, you know that. I also know that you will see those boys again and what a glorious reunion that will be. Just separated for a moment but will be together forever. Love you, M

paula said...

What a beautiful tribute to Dustin. I imagine you were sitting at your desk at work, crying as you were writing it. It makes me cry. I too cannot believe it's been 10 years. I often think about how we spent that "last weekend" together driving to Idaho, not knowing that in a matter of hours, things were about to change forever. You never know you should appreciate "normal" until it's too late. It's amazing how the missing never goes away does it? Just as strongly as I wanted to 10 years ago, I wish I could take your hurt away. I am thinking of you guys today and sending my love. There is a treat waiting for you at your house. I love you!

Jolie said...

Adrianne...First I wanted to congratulate you on your pregnancy! I am so happy for you and am excited for you to experience something that is undescribable. You will grow so much as a person yourself. How fun that the baby will have a little cousin to grow up with!

Second....I do wish your brothers were here to know their little nephew and for the baby to know them. I understand that void and heartache very well. I can't help but comfort myself to think that those who have past, are spiritual guardians and protectors of our little ones. Keep the stories of your brothers lives and the love you have for them verbal to your little one as he grows....he will feel as if he knows his uncles. My loving thoughts are with you :)

Erin said...

Adrianne...I love you..and am sending virtual hugs to you..

Erin

The Austin's said...

I don't know what else to say. Everybody else has very eloquently wrote it. I just want you to know that you and your family are in my thoughts. I can just imagine it is a hard time right now. You have always been so strong and I admire you for that. I bet your brothers are teaching your babies some tricks of their own. Thinking of you.

Missy said...

Adrianne-
You have no idea who I am but I was one of the many girls that LOVED Dustin. He was always the hottest and funnest kid. I saw your blog from July's and looked and couldn't believe when the first thing I saw was Dustins picture...it brought tears to my eyes. I'm so sorry for your losses and I am thinking about your family. Congrat's on the baby! :)
Being a mom is the BEST!!